The Things That They Can Do with Surgery Amaze Me!

So I am going in for another surgery on December 12^th, 2013 at 7:30am to have a reconstructive surgery done.  I have been going to the doctor almost daily since January 9^th due to having a wound post-surgery that would not heal.  We have tried EVERYTHING to have this wound healed but my body is saying Nope I don’t think so! 

My body has been acting this way for a while now so it is not a surprise that it would go ahead and decide to do it now but we gave it a lot of time.  This week I hit my 300^th doctor visit this year.  That is a lot I know the nurses on a first name basis and I bet if you ask them they have seen way more of me than anybody ever wants to see.  

When they do a proctocolectomy they remove the rectal stump because you do not need it any more they give you as we in the ostomy call it an action figure butt or a Barbie butt.  You know the kind that is there but completely closed up and serves no function?  Well that was supposed to happen to me, you have no idea how happy I was to have a GI Joe butt, come on my wife would love a GI Joe butt right?

Well my body decided not to heal the wound so instead of GI Joe butt I went back to a complete dysfunctional butt that would not heal.  I have a six inch by 1.5 inch cavity that will not heal or close up. So that means going in daily to have the wound packed with gauze to try and keep it from closing up too quick and causing an abscess to form.  So not only do I have to go in daily what they do to me is not pleasant by any means.  Luckily I have had some very amazing nurses and doctors who have been trying to provide the best care for me possible.

So with this surgery I will be a human jigsaw puzzle as I like to call it but I am so thankful that they are doing it so that I can hopefully be healed and moving forward.  They are going to use the two small muscles on the inside of my inner thigh the Gracilis Muscle to pull through the wound and fill the cavity and then allow my body to just heal the outside wounds.

Here is a wonderful write up about it on Wikipedia:)

 

The gracilis muscle is commonly used as a flap in microsurgery. According to the classification of Mathes and Nahai, it presents a type II blood supply, allowing it to be transferred on its artery derived from the medial circumflex femoral artery. This artery enters the muscle about 10 cm from the pubic symphysis. At this point (or 1 cm proximal) the nerve also enters.

Gracilis muscle is widely used in reconstructive surgery, either as a pedicled flap or as a free microsurgical flap. Both pedicled and free flaps can be muscular or musculocutaneos (the so- called "composite flaps"). As a pedicled flap, gracilis muscle can be used in perineal and vaginal reconstruction, after oncological surgery, in the treatment of recurrent anovaginal and rectovaginal fistulas as well in the coverage of the neurovascular bundle after vascular surgery.^[3]

As a functioning pedicled flap, the gracilis muscle can be transferred for the treatment of anal incontinence. This technique called graciloplasty was described in the 1950s by Pickrell and was revolutionized in the late 1980s by the introduction of chronic muscle electro-stimulation. The gracilis microsurgical free flap is commonly used in the reconstruction of upper and lower limbs, in breast reconstruction and – as a free functioning flap – to restore forearm function or in dynamic reconstruction of facial paralysis.Gracilis Muscles Clinical Role

So I only have 20 more daily visits to get through and then we will have surgery so please keep my family in your prayers as we go through one more but hopefully this will be the last one!

So I AM Going to Get Better At This!

So everyone can tell me YOU SUCK!

I apologize that I have been gone for so long in regards to typing up my blog but I am back on track now hopefully and will promise to get better at this. 

I am making this my own personal goal to get back into this and post as much as I possibly can.  I will be working on a new post here shortly!  Thank you everyone for supporting me and any encouragement would be accepted!  I am not going to have this be something else that I do not complete!

Jeremy

Another Secret Subject Swap!

Welcome to Take Two of August’s Secret Subject Swaps. This week, 13 brave bloggers picked a secret subject for someone else and were assigned a secret subject to interpret in their own style. Today we are all simultaneously divulging our topics and submitting our posts. 

 

Here are links to all the sites now featuring Secret Subject Swap posts.  Sit back, grab a cup, and check them all out. See you there:

 

 

http://BakingInATornado.com                            Baking In A Tornado

http://dawnsdisaster.blogspot.com                    Dawn’s Disaster

http://www.theblacksheepmom.blogspot.com      Black Sheep Mom

http://indianamericanmom.com                         Indian American Mom

http://www.homeonderanged.com                      Home on Deranged

http://coachdaddyblog.wordpress.com                  Coach Daddy

http://www.justalittlenutty.com/                           Just A Little Nutty (Guest Post)            http://www.itsyummi.com                                   It’s Yummilicious

http://dates2diapers2.blogspot.com                       Dates 2 Diapers

http://www.rocksnosaltmommy.com/                     Rocks, No Salt Mommy

http://crazyasnormal.com                                     Crazy As Normal

http://ibddaddyandme.blogspot.com/                    IBD, Daddy and Me!

www.thatsuburbanmomma.com                           That Suburban Momma

 

                   

My subject is "The first time I met my significant other, I thought... " It was submitted by http://dawnsdisaster.blogspot.com.  Here goes: 

 

It's probably a more of a fun story to hear about what Censie's parents thought of me when they first saw me, but that is not the question.  I met my wife Censie at College in Seward, Nebraska.  It is funny we grew up about 30 minutes away from each other but in Colorado it was about a world apart and it took us going to Seward, Nebraska to meet. 

 

We were both in the DCE (Director of Christian Education) program at Concordia University which is a private Lutheran college.  We had gone on a retreat to a camp to do a service project.  It was fun because I instantly thought that she was HOT and really was attracted to her.  Then I found out that she was from Colorado so I got to use that to get to know her.  She was a grade younger than me so I had a car and a way to get home to Colorado so I got to use that to hit on her. 

 

It was funny because I had to wear a sleeveless shirt at the time you know I had to show off my tattoos.  She started talking to me about them and it came up that she had a tattoo and wow that was it for me I was hooked I have a thing for tattooed women.   It just added to her hotness.  Then from there the flirting started which I suck at, just ask her.  She had to explain to me how to spell her name because it is spelled differently Censie.  She had to write it on my shirt in paint and from that point on I had a huge crush on her.

When I met her though I was dating someone else but I always had a huge crush on her and also I was in a bad point in my life.  I had been going through a lot of issues but I was able to have her as a great friend at first and then I was lucky enough to call her my girlfriend, then my wife.  She has been a rock to me and I am so lucky to have her. 

This past year has been so hard on us, I am writing this post from the hospital and thinking back this is actually the second secret subject swap that I am posting from the hospital.  She has stood by me as I have dealt with my Ulcerative Colitis, my ileostomy surgery, anxiety, depression and everything in-between.  It is funny that this journey that has now taken us throughout ten years started at a service project retreat where we were painting a house.

Sometimes you never know why people are put in front of you but I am glad that we were put together on that day.  She has been an amazing wife and best friend and I am thankful for her everyday.  So yes it was love at first sight but it just took me a while to be able to act on that love!  Thank you for this subject and I hope that everyone enjoyed hearing our story.

Now when Censie's dad saw me I was running in front of him with blue hair, smoking, and loud music blaring and he turned to his brother in law and told him that he didn't think that I was going to make it very long there at school.  And now that person is his son in law so again don't judge a book by it's cover.  Thank you for reading!

But you don't look sick!

But you look healthy? 

 

This was something that I heard a lot of while I was sick with Ulcerative Colitis and while I have been dealing with my ostomy.  Invisible illnesses and disabilities can be some of the most difficult things to deal with.  If people can see that you look sick or that you need assistance from something they are more willing to understand and help out. 

I do not like showing off my ostomy bag so I do everything I can to conceal it when I go out.  Also it makes it easier for me if I have my bag secured to my stomach and do not have it just hanging, just think a bag of poop does get heavy after a while so I hold it up with a stomach wrap.  As you saw in my previous post just ask Jude about my bag and he will be more than happy to show it off to you.

The things that people do not understand are that when I was in a flair with ulcerative colitis I was going to the bathroom 20-40 times on a bad day.  Just so we can put that in perspective if I am up from 6am-10pm that is 16 hours.  So if you are going 20 times that is 1.25 times per hour and if it is really bad it's 2.5 times per hour.  I used to get so jealous of people saying that they only pooped once a day or even that they went every other day.  I was praying for several hours off from the bathroom.  Those were also the times that I made it to the bathroom, there were several times that I was running to the bathroom and didn't make it.  So much fun let me tell you when you are at work that you have to sneak out of the bathroom to your car to leave because you had an accident. 

So I went forward to have the surgery.  Now I am just waiting for the wound to heal.  I have been going to the doctor almost every day to have a wound cared for since January 9^th, and I have to pay a copay every time.  Now throw on top of this that I have a bag that I poop into and have to change every three days and I have to empty my bag usually about every four hours.  There is always the possibility that it might leak or pop off like it has when I stand up and get it caught on something.  I have to be careful lifting things so that I do not herniate my stoma.  Also because of my open wound I have to wear diapers ever day due to the wound trying to heal.  So with all of that going on I am to remain positive all the time despite the anxiety and depression that have come along with it and have been exasperated by the prednisone that I was on. 

Yes I am getting healthy and let me be the first to tell you I am very thankful for this but there are days that I wish I had been healthy enough not to have to have an ostomy.  So next time you see someone and just assume that because they look healthy and are not needing your assistance right away that they are ok and do not need a helping hand every now and then.  We all need some support every now and then.  I like to tell Jude all the time that even Superman and Spiderman need help from their friends every now and then. 

Daddy why do you have a bag?

Dad you have a bag?  This is a question that I hear pretty frequently now a day from my son Jude!  He knows that I have an ileostomy and that I now wear a bag on my stomach.  He always asks why do you have a bag?  I have to explain to him that daddy was sick in his tummy but that this has made daddy feel better.  He then goes into to explain to me that I have poop in my bag.  I am glad he at least knows what is going on with itJ

 

These are the things that you have to deal with sometimes when you are an ostomate and a parent.  It has been a pretty large life change for the past 6 months.  I went in to the hospital on January 9^th for my surgery and I have been living with my "bag" ever since, and will be living with it for the rest of my life. 

 

Physically I have been feeling better up until recently.  My wound had healed to the point that I didn't have to go to the doctor daily anymore on May 16^th, but then in the first week of June I had problems with it. They just thought that it was something minor but I went in on the 12^th of July and the wound has reopened.  We are not sure why but I have to go in daily again to have a nurse pack the wound with dressing.  Let me tell you it is a BLAST!  Not only did this take a hit on my physically but I would say more so emotionally and mentally.  It is hard dealing with this wound that does not appear to be healing.  Overall though physically I am much better.  I am able to go out and do things with everyone without having to worry about being sick.  I do have to worry about bags coming off or leaking oh and the fun alien noises it makes but so far those have been far less common then when I was really sick and in a flair.  It is nice being able to plan to use the bathroom besides having to run to the bathroom while squeezing your butt cheeks together praying to all that is holy that you make it in time!

 

I am able to wrestle around with Jude but he knows that he has to be careful of my tummy because I have a bag.  It is an experience trying to potty train a little boy and living with an ostomy because things are done so much differently than how he does things.  He is just very curious about it but is not shy about telling people about my bag or wanting to see my bag in public, yeah that’s a fun one!

 

Mentally I feel that it has been harder than anything else.  If you have spent much time with me you know that I can be a little obsessive compulsive but I am constantly checking my back to make sure it is not leaking.  It can get annoying for others and for myself.  I also have not been dealing well with the self-esteem pieces. This will come and I know it and I am working with a counselor for it but it is a hard thing to deal with having a "shit bag" attached to your stomach every day.  There are days that I am angry at having to have it but I am trying to remain positive and remember that I am healthier with a bag than I was without one.  Overall the past six months have been an up and down roller coaster at times but I am glad that I can smile with Jude when he walks up and wants to see my bag or says why do you have a bag?  I want a bag too daddy! And I can smile at him and say I hope he doesn't but knowing that love makes it worth it!

A Honest Confession!

I have a confession to make........

 

I don't always finish what I start!  I know that this may come as a shock to you but its the truth:( 

 

 

This is a thing that I feel that I have dealt with for quite some time.  It came up in counseling and so I took a look at my life and realize that there might be some truth to this.  I also have unrealistic definitions of success and failure.

 

I have a nasty habit of when I do something that I expect to be the best at it right away and if I am not then I am a failure.  It sounds odd when I type it out but its the truth. 

 

I own two guitars and I have a love of music and always wanted to learn how to play.  I can play some but when I couldn't play every song that I wanted I got disappointed and have stopped playing them.  I also did this when I wanted to learn how to play the harmonica. 

 

This blog has been one o those as well.  When I started it I thought that this was going to be something that people are going to go crazy over and when it wasn't an overnight success I put it on the back burner.  I apologize to everyone that has supported me with this for doing that. 

 

I promise that I am working on what my definitions of success an failure are.  I know that it is going to take some work and some recommitment but I need to continue to work at this.  For those of you that know me please help hold me responsible for finishing and following through with things.  I am working to better the person I am and this is just the start!  Thanks!

Jeremy

Houston We Have a Problem!

AHHHHHH!!!!  We Have a Problem!

 

So many of you may find this to be an odd post but Houston We have a Problem.  JUDE LIKES TO EAT MUSTARD!

 

I'm talking about the kind of mustard that looks like a yellow crayon vomited on his hot dog!

 

 

You know you do everything you can to try and teach your child well and then they go and do something like this.  At least on his hot dog he also enjoyed it with Ketchup and Sweet Relish but I need advice! 

 

How do I handle a mustard lover?  My father was so proud but I am struggling with how do we connect.  I am anti-mustard will this have an impact on our future food bonding?  I mean what is next putting it on hamburgers or sandwich's?  What does a first mustard experience lead to?  There are so many questions I have about what to expect with a child who uses mustard?

 

If you can please send me any experience I would appreciate it! 

 

Ketchup lovers of the world unite!  

A Quick Look Into My Brain! (Buckle up!)

“Every man has his secret sorrows which the world knows not; and often times we call a man cold when he is only sad.”
― Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

The definition of Depression is as follows:

1. Severe despondency and dejection, accompanied by feelings of hopelessness and inadequacy.

2. A condition of mental disturbance, typically with lack of energy and difficulty in maintaining concentration or interest in life.

I however would describe it as a nasty snake that can creep in and wrap itself around you and it will easily consume you before you even know it is there.  This snake as I like to call it has had a major impact on my life for quite some time, now whether or not I want to admit it is a whole different story.

              Growing up mental health was not something that was talked about or even I feel accepted in my family.  If you were felt different you didn’t talk about it you didn’t go see someone you just dealt with it.  Now this may have been only my perceived impression of how it was handled, but then again this is my blog and that is how I felt!

              I think that there are many people who have a negative view of depression and that they feel that all I do is sit around my house in a robe eating and crying.  I can let you know that is not the case.  I get up I go to work everyday and I come home and spend time playing with my family but mentally I do struggle with this.  It is a challenge that I fight every day that no one sees, I wish I could let people see it because then I think that it would be understood more but sadly I can’t put a projector on my brain and let you see what is going on in there.

              It's funny in many ways how many people will say things negatively about depression without knowing that they are talking to someone who is dealing with the same illness they are talking poorly about.  It took me a while and a lot of encouragement from my wonderful wife Censie but I started seeing a therapist and it has helped.  Now it's not like walking in having an epiphany and then I am all done but it is an ongoing battle of ups and downs where there are days that I feel great and then days that I feel like total shit.  I think that having my surgery has been hard for me mentally even though I feel healthy I am still adjusting to having a bag on my stomach for the rest of my life.  So this is something that I will continually look in the face and know that it is a part of me but it is not something that will consume me for the rest of my life.  I need to be present for my children and for my family!

“Man is not worried by real problems so much as by his imagined anxieties about real problems”
― Epictetus

The definition of Anxiety is as follows:

1   A feeling of worry, nervousness, or unease, typically about an imminent event or something with an uncertain outcome.

2.  Desire to do something, typically accompanied by unease.

              Now I compared depression to a snake that wraps itself around you where now I will compare Anxiety a little pesky worm inside your brain hopped up on speed making sure that you worry about everything.  In my case I worry about pretty much everything at all times.  So lets recap I have a snake holding me down and a worm making sure that I worry about every small detail about everything.

              If you have known me for any part of my life you could probably easily see me as being a pretty anxious person.  I get really bad social anxiety at this point as well.  Some of my anxiety stems from IBD.  I would always worry about what if eat something that makes me sick, where is the bathroom, are people counting how many times I go to the bathroom, and do people think I am making myself sick?  Now I worry about is my bag going to pop off, do people think that I smell, what are people thinking about me? 

              I also have a strong desire to make everyone like me and I cannot handle thinking that people are mad at me.  My coworkers know this now about me and it has become a joke that someone is just going to come up and say they are mad at me because they know I will not be able to let it go.  I worry about how people look at me and if they are judging me or if I did something to make them upset.  I worry about what people think about how me, how I look how I act.  It's like running a sprint all the time in my brain and it can be exhausting at times. 

              Luckily Censie has stood by me through all of these challenges because my Depression and my Anxiety were exasperated these last three years in dealing with my Ulcerative Colitis. 

              I am writing this post not to get people to feel sorry for me but to make mental health more normal and show an insight into my world.  I constantly hear bad things about people with mental health or that we must be weak if we go to counseling.  I would say the opposite.  I think that it takes a ton of strength to go to someone and admit that you need help and that you need support.  I want to make sure that neither of my children ever feels bad about being down on themselves or being nervous but if it becomes a huge issue in your life then you need to go and seek out support. 

Trying to Get Back in a Routine!

How is it April already?

 This month was supposed to be my first month back to work after my surgery!  I had all these grandiose plans of getting back into a routine and just moving forward, we all know how well that has been working! 

 

I went back to work for two weeks and then ended up in the hospital for another week which mentally set me back and we had to keep moving forward at this point.  I went in for another surgery for them to clean the wound and then was discharged thankfully and able to return home.

 

So I decided to start again this week and we were going to get back to a routine.  Luckily I survived this week despite some saddening news at this point in my recovery.  So I have been meeting with my regular surgeon every week and he told me that at this point he is seeing limited healing in the wound, the wound looks good but it is not healing as well as it should be.  Last week he talked to me about meeting with a plastic surgeon.  He said that they were talking about removing muscle from my leg and then filling the wound with that muscle.  This is how it has been described to me thus far.  I am meeting with the plastic surgeon Thursday of this week.  My doctor told me that I would be looking at another 3-4 day hospital say.  As Censie says we all know how my body responds so we will plan a week.  I have mixed emotions about this on one hand it would heal the wound then the other hand it is another surgery and another hospital stay.  You know what is another hospital stay when you have spent 26 days in the hospital over the past four months!!!

 

Luckily this week I got to be home and was able to go to Jude's first soccer practice.  He had a great time and did so well for one of the youngest kids out there.  Now he is not the smallest kid out there but is one of the youngest.  It was nice to be able to get out and play with him, however running for the first time with my ileostomy was a little weird and is going to take some getting used to. 

 

 

Then on Saturday after my daily visit to the nurse, yes those are still going on I have no idea when it is going to ever end!  We went and did Easter Egg Scramble.  Jude had fun even though we only came home with one Twizzler and one empty egg.  He did really good being patient.  This is one of my favorite pictures!

 

 

Then on Sunday we went to church and then hunted for more Easter Eggs.  We had a great time playing and eating candy throughout the day, whoops daddy has a sweet tooth.  Then later in the evening he crashed, I got to cuddle with my little boy, not something that happens very often any more.  It was nice being able to have a day where I didn't have to worry about my ileostomy or having to go the doctor.

 

I am really hoping that I will be able to have more days like this but I will know more on Thursday.  I will make sure to keep everyone up to date on what is going on and if I am going to have to have another surgery.  Thank you all!



The Hospital Must Have Missed Me!

I'M Back In The Hospital!

 

 

As many of you know I have been dealing with the recover from my surgery for the past two months,  This has required me to have a nurse come to my house, and since I have been at work I have had to go into Kaiser every single day to have a wound packed and changed.  There have been ongoing issues.  Most of these issues have been from the nurses not knowing how to pack a wound and doing it incorrectly.

 

My nurse on Saturday packed it wrong and put too much packing in the wound.  With there being too much packing in the wound, the bacteria did not get a chance to come out it just sat there in the wound and they think the bacteria grew into the wound.  So Monday I started to feel very sick and had a fever, chills, and aches.  My doctor then wanted me to come in and we did a CT Scan and blood tests.  After all of those tests he still could not figure out what was going wrong with me exactly so I got admitted to the hospital. 

 

 

When they admitted me they hooked me up to IV antibiotics throughout the day.  Sadly this did not seem to work.  They were pumping the antibiotics but my fever still stuck around and even got worse.  It got all the way up to 102.6 this was not good and I was getting irritated, scared and nervous. 

 

 

Today, Wednesday Morning, my surgeon took me down to surgery and cut the wound open more and then cleaned it out.  Basically he power washed my wound.  He thinks that he was able to find out where the infection was coming from so that is good.  Since I have been back in my room I have feel like my fever was gone but we will just have to wait and see.  I have been here at the hospital since Monday night and looks like I am not going home till Thursday at the earliest.  I think that we are ready to be somewhat normal and not have to deal with all these illnesses.  This one has taken its emotional toll on me and I have had a few breakdowns.  Luckily I have had many people to lean on.  I appreciate every one's support and I will work on keeping up with my blog more and making sure that you all have the most updated information.  Thank you again for everything. 

 



World Meet Gustav, Gustav Meet the World!

Drum roll please..............................

 

 

Ladies and Gentleman..........................

 

 

I am pleased to introduce to you my Ileostomy and Stoma that I have named Gustav!

 

As many of you know I had to go in for a proctocolectemy in January and at this point I have a permanent Ileostomy. 

 

This is something that I am still coming to terms with but I have named it and Gustav just seemed to fit.  A long time ago I had a kid introduce me to his Gerbil who's name was Gustav Thomas.  So when I thought of a name Gustav just came to the front of my mind. 

 

I think that the hard part for me has been the healing, sad to hear huh?  I am still healing and we are almost two months past surgery, and to be honest I was not really prepared for all the healing that I am dealing with but we are almost there.

 

Since having my Ileostomy I have joined many groups on facebook and it seems as though one big step for people is to post a picture of them with their bag.  I get it, we are no longer hiding and we want people to know that this is who we are, and in my case will be for the rest of my life. 

 

My Ileostomy has saved my life and has given my life back to me as well.  I am trying to make sure that I never become ashamed of it.  I will do everything I can from here on out to wear my bag with pride and honor because the scars show the fight that I gave for so long before having this surgery.  So without further ado I present to you Gustav!

 

 



Recovery? This Is Supposed To Be Easy Right?

Recovery?

 

So I am finally getting around to writing this post.  I don't know why but this has been one of the hardest posts to write.  I think that it is because I am having to go through everything again and think about all that I went through in the hospital. 

 

Hopefully you have already read my post http://ibddaddyandme.blogspot.com/2013/02/proctocolectomy-whats-that.html about my proctocolectemy surgery.  The surgery was only supposed to last 6-7 hours, but I can never do anything as planned so I went for 9-10 hours.  After the surgery the fun began, well I guess from what I can remember.  They had to place me in ICU right after my surgery because my heart rate was going sky high.  Now this is all information that has been told to me because I DON'T REMEMBER ANY OF IT!!!!

 

So I spent the night in ICU and then the next day as well.  Censie has told me that my mother came in and was talking to me and I asked her what time it was. She told me that it was noon and I told her that People's Court was on, how did I know that and how do I not remember watching People's Court in the ICU.  The only thing that I really remember about ICU was that they finally got me a normal room.  The only problem was I was on an ICU bed so I had to move beds, remember I had only been out of surgery for about 24 hours.  Trust me there were plenty of choice words that were said while we were moving from bed to bed.

 

 

So I finally got up to my normal room and was trying to get going on everything.  The next day I started on clear liquids and was up trying to move and walk  My parents were impressed with how far I was walking right after surgery.  I thought wow we are doing well and we are going to have a smooth road ahead with this recovery, stupid brain!  I did not have that smooth road ahead sadly.  Saturday I was so excited because my kiddos were coming up to see me for the first time, after not seeing them since Wednesday morning this was going to be awesome!  Once again nothing can go as planned.  I had been working on eating clear liquid, Jude had brought me some balloons to make me feel better.  Luckily he was distracted because the clear liquids did not sit well.  I asked for a bucket but sadly no one could find one in time and I vomited all over myself. 

 

So sadly at this point we had to rush Jude out of the room at that point so I could get cleaned up and he had to go home.  Then later in the evening the right side of my face started to swell up.  So they were concerned with an infection or an abscess in my face.  All great things to think about while sitting in the hospital.  So they then had to take me down for a CT Scan on my face.  This was all fine I wanted to see what was going on but again had to change beds, and then when they were bringing me back they took me to the wrong room I had to remind them what room I was in!  So luckily it was not the scary things that we had been talking about but my saliva gland shut down, come on can I catch a break.  So at this point I was running a pretty high fever kept feeling sick to my stomach and felt pretty horrible.  I remember my mom sitting by my bed until almost midnight just holding my hand because I felt so sick.

 

So now we are to Sunday, see what I am talking about I had a great time.  Sunday was a sad day because my parents were leaving to head back home that day.  I continued to try and get up and walk so that I could do as much as possible and hopefully be able to go home as soon as possible.  The problem was that every time that I would eat something I would be sick to my stomach.  The had been giving me antibiotics as well to help with the swelling in my face and trying to get the saliva gland to start working as well.  I was told by my doctor that with these types of surgeries that the small intestine goes to sleep and has to wake up to start processing the fluids into my bag.  They were thinking that mine small intestine was still asleep, so again got up walking trying to make it wake up and start working.

 

Monday then came and I continued to try and eat items and continued to try and walk.  I was trying to be the model patient and was trying to do everything I could to make this work.  The doctors talked to me about putting in an NG tube, which is a tube that goes in through your nose and sucks all the fluid out of your stomach, fun I know but we decided not to do that yet.  However I continued to vomit and get sick to my stomach on Monday.  So then came Tuesday, I had a very small say in it but we decided to put the NG Tube in.  If you have never had an NG Tube placed please pray that you never have to have it done.  This was an experience that I never wanted to have and pray I never have to again.  So while you are awake you have a tube placed down your nose and you have to keep trying to swallow while the keep pushing.  So the problem with this is that I had a ton of fluid built up on my stomach from the prior two days with eating and drinking fluid.  So as you can imagine fluid on your stomach and being gagged does not work out well.  I feel extremely sorry for the two nurses, because I vomited twice all over them!  This was a little embarrassing.  They got it in luckily and started taking the fluid off, I felt a ton better but still shocked that this took place. 

 

So I have never shared this picture I hated it but you can see the fun of the NG tube and also the swelling in my face.

 

So the problem with an NG Tube is that you do not get to eat or drink anything while it is in.  So from Tuesday to Saturday it was pretty much the same thing. Sitting around, napping, visiting, trying to walk as much as possible, and not thinking about eating or drinking.  I was lucky though the did give me a wet washcloth to wipe the inside of my mouth out because it was so dry but they would take it away right away so that I didn't suck the water out of it.  So with having this NG Tube put in I had a PICC Line put in which is an IV but goes into a Large Vein in my chest.  The reason that this was put in was because they then gave me what they call TPN, which as my nurses tried to tell me is steak in bag.  It gave me all the nutrition that I needed. 

 

Luckily they then did allow me to start eating lemon drops so that the sour would hopefully help my saliva gland would hopefully start working.  So then they turned off the NG tube and I was allowed to start drinking items again and the best part was that my stoma started producing and my Ostomy was working!  This was awesome news because finally the whole reason we did the surgery was beginning to work!  So then on Saturday they took the NG Tube out, this was not fun either.  I got very little warning they just took the tape off and then pulled, I could not believe what just happened to me but was so thankful to have it out.  I then started eating food and then by Monday I was getting discharged from the hospital.  I am amazed at how much the NG Tube helped my healing and if I had known it was going to do that then I would have done it sooner.    So this is my story of my hospital stay but in the end it worked out well and I was able to come home with "Gustav" the stoma.  Thank you for taking the time to read this as well as every one's ongoing support!

Time To Do Another Group Giveaway!

The National Parenting Publications Awards (NAPPA) is one of the oldest and most respected awards programs in the country. With over 20 years of experience in the industry, we have been continuously celebrated as the "go-to" source for parents and professionals seeking the best products for their children and families. NAPPA holds two competitions annually:

• Children's Products Competition

• Parenting Resources Competition

NAPPA enlists a team of independent expert judges and family testers to review each submission thoroughly. Together, they select the most entertaining, appealing, safe, educational, age-appropriate and enduring products as NAPPA Gold, Silver and Honors winners. A NAPPA recognition is more than just a seal of approval. It signifies that a product has been rigorously evaluated against stringent criteria and that it stands out among hundreds of similar products from around the world. Products that receive the prestigious NAPPA award are quality products that parents and professionals can trust.

NAPPA a Rafflecopter giveaway
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Proctocolectomy What's That?

PROCTOCOLECTOMY?!?!?!

 

So I know that I have been gone for a while but I am still trying to heal and get going on my feet again.  So I thought that I would try and get this post going through.  Many people have asked what exactly I had done.  I had a total proctocolectomy, that probably doesn't mean much to you but here is the description from www.webmd.com

 

 

In proctocolectomy, the large intestine and rectum are removed, leaving the lower end of the small intestine (the ileum). The doctor sews the anus closed and makes a small opening called a stoma in the skin of the lower abdomen. The surgical procedure to create the stoma (or any other artificial opening) is called an ostomy.

 

The ileum is connected to the stoma, creating an opening to the outside of the body. The surgery that creates the opening to the intestine is called an ileostomy.

Stool empties into a small plastic pouch called an ostomy bag that is applied to the skin around the stoma. You have to empty the bag several times a day.

So as you can tell they attacked me from both my stomach and also my bottom in a polite way to say it.  It has been a major change for my family and I and I am still trying to recover, yes even over a month post surgery I am still having to heal.  I will talk more about my hospital stay and all the excitement that came with that in another post.  I hope to get back into posting on a more regular basis.  Thanks for reading!

Let the Journey Begin!

So I know that I have been MIA for the last couple of weeks.  As many of you know my family and I have engaged in a huge journey.  I was diagnosed with Ulcerative Colitis in 2009 and it has come to an end here in 2013.

 

I am going to be doing a series of blogs about the proctocolectemy surgery that I had on 1/9/2013, the day I was cured of ulcerative colitis.  This is how I am viewing it, as you will hear throughout the next couple of weeks, as I am at home recovering from surgery and processing what has changed.  I AM going to remain optimistic about this process and will view it as I am CURED of this illness and I get my life back.  Now I know that this is going to come with many lumps and bumps, lucky you guys are the ones that get to hear about them, but I know that we made the right choice.

 

So this journey began on the weekend on January 5th.  This was my last weekend of solid food before I had to do the prep for the surgery.  Censie was great we went out to dinner a couple of times and spent some time with the kiddos.  It was a great "last" weekend, I cannot thank her enough for this because as you will hear the next couple of weeks were not the easiest.  I then went on clear liquids on Monday.  This is something that I have done many times due to having colonoscopies.  I have had 12 colonoscopies in three years, however I am done with those now.

 

I began eating jello and drinking Gatorade.  I am a huge food guy so this is hard for me but I knew that it was something that had to be done.  I was also able to clean my house and get everything ready that I could because my parents were coming out to help with the family after the surgery and to be here with me.  I felt that this was the least that I could do because I knew that Censie was going to have her hands full after the surgery.  I then had to begin the cleansing drinks on Tuesday. 

 

I like to call it the liquid flu because as soon as you start drinking it you get so sick to your stomach that you do have to stand there by the bathroom.  My parents came later that night and I was able to spend some time with them.  These are all going to be times that I am going to and have looked back on with happiness because of being able to laugh and have joy with them.  The next day we had to get up super early to be at the hospital so that I could have surgery.  I will be working on that post soon, it is going to be a lot of medical jargon stuff since I don't remember much, thank goodness!  Thank you for following this journey and like I said I have a lot to put down on paper.  Thank you all for following me on this journey and please if you have any questions please leave a comment or email me!  

Secret Subject Swap!

Welcome to a Secret Subject Swap. 17 brave bloggers picked a secret subject for someone else and were assigned a secret subject to interpret in their own style. Today we are all simultaneously divulging our topics and submitting our posts. 

 

 

Here are links to all the sites now featuring Secret Subject Swap posts.  Sit back, grab a cup, and check them all out. See you there:

 

www.BakingInATornado.com                             

 http://menopausalmother.blogspot.com/ 

http://lifeonthesonnyside.blogspot.com/

http://suburbiainterrupted.com/                             

http://www.bigaandlittlea.com                               

http://ibddaddyandme.blogspot.com

http://stacysewsandschools.wordpress.com/

www.3monkeysandamartini.com

http://sadderbutwiser.wordpress.com/

http://www.somethingclever2point0.com/

http://www.themommyref.blogspot.com/

http://rushingforbagels.blogspot.com

http://gocheapgohome.com

www.rebekaches.com

http://mooreorganizedmayhem.blogspot.com/

http://slackermomof4.blogspot.com/

http://www.mommyunmuted.com/

                

My subject is Share a bloggy goal that you hope to achieve this year.  It was submitted by http://www.bigaandlittlea.com . Here goes: 

So my goal this year is to tale over the Daddy blogging community (insert diabolical  laugh at this point).  No really I want to be able to grow my audience and share with other fathers and also others dealing with IBD and after Wednesday now dealing with an Ostomy.

This has been a major change for me over the last couple of days and actually I am in the hospital as I am writing this.  I have a permanent Ileostomy on my stomach so I will be blogging about how the surgery and the recovery goes. 

I am pretty new on the blogging scene so I am just starting off so I have a lot of goals. I think that I keep coming up with new goals everyday.   I think that there a lot of daddy blogs out there but I feel that there are several that control the whole scene and I would like to infiltrate that tight knit group and bring in a fresh look and also a armature approach.  I am not a professional writer, I actually suck at writing but I am not going to give up.  Thank you so much for everyone for letting me be part of this blogging post.  I will try and type more as the pain meds wear off but thank you again!